I feel fine most days and I don't think that I am stressing about the microarray results but I think my body is trying to tell me differently. This week started off with me getting a huge crink in my neck. I've gotten them before but haven't in a long time but it is a sure sign that I am stressed. My shoulders are really tense and I have knots right along my shoulder blades. My acupuncturist helped to get rid of the crink in my neck but then since the crink couldn't be there, it shifted places...over to my chest.
Now before everyone freaks out, I have had chest pains before and they were definitely stress related. I've had EKG's several times and there is nothing wrong with my heart. I also know these are stress related chest pains because I can actually feel the muscles knotted in my chest and when I press on them, like you would press on a knot in your back, it hurts. So, stress related and nothing else. My TCM doctor also said that the point that hurt was what they call a "spirit point" and that meant that my spirit was low. How to fix? No idea. She did stick a needle in it and now, I am happy to report that the pain is gone. Gotta love the TCM thought process...does it hurt? Than let's stick a needle in it!
I actually had a dream last night about getting our results and the funny thing was that it indirectly involved Sue as she is also currently awaiting her results (although from CGH not microarray). It wasn't a stressful dream, but the fact that I dreamed about it makes me think that this whole wait is weighing heavily on my mind, if only in my subconscious at this point. In my dream, I received an envelope through the mail and I just knew it was results from CGH/microarray. However, somehow I knew, as you only can "know" in dreams, that the results didn't belong to me - they were Sue's and there was a mix up and they sent her results to me by accident. I wanted to open the envelope, even though the results weren't mine (talk about being nosy!) because in my dream, I was convinced that Sue's results were a predictor for my own. I knew that opening up Sue's results was wrong but I wanted to know and not know all at the same time. The dream ended with me still conflicted about opening up the envelope. Weird eh?
We're fast approaching the 4 week wait mark and I called my nurse today to talk about the FET calendar since I want to squeeze the transfer in before the June shut down at CCRM. We'll see what she says and maybe once I have a timeline in place, it will get me moving on other things that I have been procrastinating about.
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Update - spoke with my nurse and the shut down for ET is from May 30th to June 7th (1 week). I think it's longer for ER and she didn't tell me what the shut down was for ER but I suspect it's an additional week, although which week (i.e. the one before or the one after the shut down for ET) I don't know.
For Good
12 years ago
7 comments:
Oh goodness! The body is powerful and yours is def. stressed! Sounds like you are doing all good things though!
Hoping the rest of the wait flys by!
Oh gosh! I so know how stress can manifest itself physically. I know you're anxiously awaiting your results, and I hope you get them soon! When I did CGH, our wait was 3w6d - and I thought that was torture! Hang in there. :)
Dreams can be funny like that. Maybe you guys will get your results on the same day or something...or you'll have the same results...it will be interesting to see.
Glad the TCM is going so well, but sorry about the pains and all of the stress.
Sorry you are experiencing the crazy dreams too! Its funny, every time I think about the long wait for results, you come up too - I think we were just too close in our cycles and the wait is similar, we had a similar number go out for testing, etc.
I've tried to settle in to the wait too...but now I have added stress. Without the BCP's I have to start lupron on CD20 so I HAVE to get my results before then otherwise we are pushed off a month (stress!) and if we only get one, then I start lupron on CD20 for another cycle (which is really great but really really freaking me out b/c we are broke but I still want to do this if only 1 is normal). And, either way, if no results by CD20, the we wait another cycle. Ugh! I wish I could shut my brain off.
Oh I know the pain the back, shoulders, and neck can get into when stress is weighing heavily on them. I HATE that!
And I agree - before I redirected the winds of change on this most recent cycle I wondered if they could schedule a FET to happen just right after the 8 week mark ... I mean, if the results should come back that quickly - then why delay? Let's go people, let's go!!! But it sounds like you'll get in before the June shutdown, so that's good.
The news you're waiting on carries a lot of weight, so it's no surprise to hear that you're dealing with stress. Hang in there, I hope your results come back soon and more importantly that it's good news.
KJ, that was a cool but stressful dream. I hope you get great results quickly. Thanks to you I went for acupuncture, maya abdominal massage and I have the castor oil (haven't started yet though).
Not too much longer for you!
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