Goodness in the World, Nerves & Saizen

I wanted to start this post off on a very positive note. Someone that I "met" through IVFC has very generously donated her meds to me! There are still some very kind people left in this world and I am so very grateful to her. The timing of this couldn't be better since I am completely OOP and this second attempt at our last cycle in the US has stretched our finances to the absolute maximum. Cash flow is tight and everything counts and she is saving me a bundle of $$ with these meds. Grateful hardly describes how I feel and this really restores my belief in the good of people. A very heartfelt "thank you".

There was also a flurry of activity today getting ready for my upcoming cycle. I booked flights using our reward points for myself and my DH. My flight was not a problem since I was just redeeming points for a new ticket. My DH's ticket was another story since I was trying to use an unused ticket from October '08 when were supposed to go out there the first time. Those of us Canadians who have ever dealt with Air Canada and their Aeroplan reward program know what I mean (roll eyes here). I won't bore you with the details but suffice to say, it wasn't easy but we managed to accomplish this small feat this morning. We're both booked now - I'm flying in on Feb 24th and he will be joining me on Mar 5th. We're both flying out on March 11th.

I'm nervous about whether the timing will work out or not. It's always a delicate balancing act. AF better be on time (and she usually is) but I'm nervous given than I'm going to be playing with my hormones again this month and taking 3 shots of Cetrotide right before she is scheduled to arrive. IF all things go as planned, I will fly in on CD 2 (Feb 24th) and be in for a suppression check that morning right from the airport. If all goes well, I will be starting stims the next day (Feb 25th) with an estimated ER on Mar 8 after 10 days of stims. Things were going pretty slowly last time so we can go as far out as Mar 10th for ER and then I would fly out the very next day.

Of course, I have to watch the weather to make sure that there are no storms brewing either up here or down in Colorado. I don't want to screw up my cycle because I don't fly in on time. I'm also nervous AF will either be early or late which will throw off the timing. Geez...do I ever run out of things to worry about?? Last cycle it was a little easier to predict my schedule as we locked and loaded my calendar when I started the BCP. This time I'm relying on the arrival of AF. I know things will figure themselves out but that doesn't stop the worry in the meantime. Maybe I need to go meditate (or is it medicate??) and get rid of some of that stress...

So the Saizen debate...I think I am finally ready to let it go as in I am not going to request that it be added to my cycle. For those of you who are on it, I will be watcing your cycles with great interest and I am by no means saying that it is a bad thing to have. For me, I keep coming back to the point that Dr. Sch did not recommend that it be added for me and I am paying so much money for his advice. Also, last time we had the best response ever with the antagonist cycle but the poorest quality so I'm hoping that with the estrogen priming he added to my cycle, that will be enough to coax some better eggs out. Someone else with Saizen added to her cycle told me that Dr. Sch's objective in doing so was to get maybe 1-2 more eggs out. For me, my body clearly does not like all the meds since I respond so poorly to them. I figure that adding yet another medication would probably not be received well by my body so I'm going to leave it. I just want better quality eggs than the last time I did an antagonist cycle (10 eggs retrieved but only 2 lousy looking embies to transfer 3 days post retrieval). Let's hope that is the right answer for me and my body for now, this is what feels right and I have debated this endlessly for the past few weeks. So, here ends the Saizen debate.