And you know what? I'm not talking about my life for once.
My BF's mother was just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Yes, this is the same type of cancer that Randy Pausch, author of The Last Lecture, was diagnosed with. My BF's mother is to undergo surgery to remove the tumour in a few weeks and the doctor gives her a 30-50% chance that she will still be here in 5 years if the tumour doesn't return. My BF is a numbers person, just like me, and it is hard when the majority isn't on your side.
Again, I ask the question "why"? Why her Mom and at such a young age? Her Mom is just in her mid sixties and leads a very active life. She is an incredibly giving person, always travelling to visit family and friends and the first person to lend a hand should the need arise. She sits on the board of a large charity and has done so much volunteer work it puts the rest of us to shame. She has so much gentle wisdom and has sacrificed so much for those she loves.
I know that I am very guilty of putting blinders on and thinking that only MY life is unfair and that everyone else exists in a fairness vacuum where the good receive all the blessings and the bad receive nothing but curses. This is not so. Again, another example of how there is no rhyme or reason to life and maybe the more pertinent question is not "why?" but rather "how?"
How should we live our lives given the challenges we face?
How do we make the most of the time we have been given?
How do we make good choices while remaining true to ourselves?
How can we grow through our experiences?
How do we cope?
I suppose that in asking "how?" rather than "why?" we are encouraged into action when we contemplate the answers, rather than wallowing in the inevitable (and sometimes necessary) self-pity that accompanies the answers to "why?". Believe me, I have spent my fair share of time in why-land. Maybe the only pathway is to go through "why" to get to "how" and it is in figuring out the "how" that we find a way to move forward.
Please, if you have a few moments today, say a little prayer for my friend and her mother. Thanks.
For Good
13 years ago
9 comments:
I'm so sorry to hear about your friend's mom. It's always so hard to see such wonderful people be given life threatening situations and leaves us questioning everything. Of course I have a few moments to pray for her.
God, I lift up this wonderful lady to you. You know her heart and you know her desires. I ask for complete healing, from head to toe. Give her and her family strength and peace as they walk through this trial. In Your name.. Amen
That is such awful news. Pancreatic cancer is brutal. I lost my mom to lung cancer (she never smoked) 18 months ago. I'm still not over it and probably won't be (not even sure I want to be).
I hate cancer with all my heart.
I hope your friend's mom kicks the crap out of the beast and lives to tell the story to her great grandchildren.
Best wishes!
I am keeping your friend's mom in my thoughts and prayers. Your post really made me stop and think about life. I too always seem to think...I have it so bad (infertility and colitis). But after reading this and then seeing Sky's comment about her mom, really put things in perspective for me. Again sending you a giant hug!!!
Prayers of course. I found your site looking for info on endo. Did an expert diagnose your endo? A regular ob/gyn often does not know where to look or how to recognize it. My ob/gyn thought I had none, an expert found a ton and removed it. I highly recommend these people, enterforendo.com...
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PS. Do they check your hormone levels? This is a great site.
http://www.naprotechnology.com/
http://www.naprotechnology.com/progesterone.htm
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I am so sorry to hear about your friend's mom. That is such a scary, scary diagnosis and such a hard thing to deal with and come to terms with. My BF lost her mom last year to lung cancer and I experienced my friend's pain through phone conversations, visits, emails and any way I could. Nothing makes this easier. I do struggle with the "why" and I do agree, it really makes more sense to turn to the other side and try for "how", if you are in a place where you can actually do that.
I will say prayers.
Cancer is awful. I used to work as a hospice nurse. I'm really sorry for your friend and her mom.
Thinking of you.
I am so sorry for your BF, her mom and everyone who knows this wonderful woman. I will think of her today and often and hope that their fight is quick and easy.
We found out that my aunt has spine, liver, lung, breast and brain cancer last week. We have several other family members who have been diagnosed with some sort of cancer. I hate cancer!
Thinking of all of you,
Kris
I apologize for being a little late in commenting, but I just wanted to say that I am so sorry that your friend and her mother are going through such a scary thing. I can't even imagine. Sending up prayers for them now.
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